What About the Children?

Ford F-150 (wink wink)

August 27, 2009

I love the Ford F-150. Its such an awesome truck! (the preceding was a shameless product promotion for my own amusement). OK, so I don’t know who actually wrote the following “Random Thoughts of the Day” but if anyone does, please give me their name so that I can give them proper credit. This was […]

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Anatomical Pet Names (Part Deux)

August 25, 2009

So what about my son? Well, I don’t recall who was responsible for the anatomical pet name we used for him, but what the heck, I’ll blame my wife. I do this because the name picked was “Penny.” I realize that it was close to the name of the actual anatomical part, but c’mon, a […]

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Anatomical Pet Names

August 21, 2009

One of the benefits of fatherhood is the ability to watch cartoons with your children and not feel guilty. I have taken advantage of this for nearly 7 years now, and I admit it freely. (Note to single men: I do not recommend borrowing the neighbor kids for cartoon viewing. Chances are, you’re gonna end […]

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Rates of Exchange

August 18, 2009

I admit it, I eavesdrop on occasion, and just such an occasion arose a few days ago as I was waiting to be seated at a restaurant. I overheard two teenage girls talking about whether someone named “Morgan” really liked hanging out with them, and if he did, why he always ditched them, etc. So, […]

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Birds and the Bees

August 7, 2009

I welcome reader questions! I got the following question from in response to “The Talk”: “Why is it called the Birds and the Bees? They don’t mate on each other as the birds would get stung and die. Right?” Well, I’m not sure that a Bee can sting through a Bird’s layer of feathers unless […]

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"Hoot Ears"

August 7, 2009

“Dad, what are Hoot-Ears?” The simplicity of the questions from my 6 year old daughter, as we sat in the Walgreen’s pharmacy drive thru should have been a warning. But I was distracted. “Hoot Ears? What are you talking about? “That sign over there. It says “Hoot Ears.” And there it was, across the parking […]

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Below the Belt!

July 31, 2009

I am a proud father of two children! Kids are great, but the measures they employ to ensure that they don’t have any siblings are amazingly brutal for Dads. What is it with kids and their incessant need to pummel a man’s groin? I wish I could chalk it up to some kind of gravitational […]

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The Talk

July 24, 2009

I was watching Oprah the other day, but only under duress. I had come downstairs after putting my children to bed, and found my wife glued to the TV. It was the television equivalent of being landlocked, and she refused my request for an easement to Sports Center. The Oprarain topic was this: At what […]

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July 21, 2009

When did this word become an appropriate response to behavior alternatives posed by adults to children? As in, “Well, you can either clean up your room, or lose the DS for a week.” “Whatever!!” Clearly there is a “disconnect” here between the parental perception of the gravity of the situation and the perception held by […]

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Turn About is Fair Play

July 14, 2009

I never really appreciated the value of children until I learned that they make great excuses!! Here’s a great example that happened several years ago when Angela, Jenna, and I went to the Roseville Auto Mall to look for a new car. As we all know, car salesmen can be like vultures once the get […]

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