Fun Size

November 14, 2010

As I was rummaging through the Halloween cache of candy my kids were able to amass, I noticed that all these little bite sized morsels were labeled “Fun Size.” Really? Since when has getting a smaller piece of candy been fun? Folks, this is classic marketing at it’s best. The candy industry is actually trying to convince us that less is more. Of course, this naturally begs the question “How long will it take before the condom industry follows suit?

I can see the commercial now, “When you’ll settle for nothing but the best, the only choice is Trojan, now available in ‘fun size’ for her pleasure.” And what the heck, as long as we’re making the names “user friendly” why not come up with something for the other sizes, too. “Now available in ‘Fun Size’, ‘Who am I Kidding’, and “We’re Going To Need a Bigger Boat’.”

My guess is that they’ll have to do something because they are scared to death that someone will figure out that condoms and house paint are made out of the same stuff, Latex. It’s only a matter of time before some redneck gets the bright idea to go over to Sears and buy a gallon of Weather Beater paint. You can just imagine the conversation with his wife,

“Earl, what in THE hell are you doing naked in the garage with that can of paint?”

“Don’t gimme no lip, woman! Times are tough. We can’t afford to be havin’ no more kids, and them rubbers are too darned expensive. So I got this here idea, and once I finish puttin’ on this second coat, I’ll be good for two winters.”

I bet he had to buy a “Fun Size” brush to do the job.

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